In the early morning hours of Monday May 13th, our beloved mother was raised up by our heavenly father to be with her creator and savior after a beautiful and peaceful Mother’s Day and a courageous battle with cancer. And that she was, a warrior of faith, love and perseverance for family friends and her community. B.J. (Berna Jo) Menge Fiedler Allen was born in Glasgow, MT on August 27th, 1944 to Bernard J. “Pat” and Pansy Menge of Saco, MT. She is the devoted sister to Darrell (Loretta) Menge of Saco, Gregg (Sue) Menge of Lewistown and Kirk (Kelly) Menge of Billings. BJ is a loving and dedicated mother to her children Rachael (Lindy) Haynes of Red Lodge, Kristin (Paul) McColly of Hinsdale, and Clint (Anna) Allen of Ankeny, IA. Her grandchildren, Ethan and Aidan Haynes, John, Kaitlyn, CharLee and BaiLee McColly and Caleb and Addison Allen will remember her devotion and love!
Berna Jo Menge, or BJ as she was most affectionately known by, was named after her father, something she would occasionally refer to with her mother. Overheard one evening sometime in the late 80s after mom got off the phone spelling her name a few times to someone who must have been a bit hard of hearing possibly, “So mom …why does the only daughter get named after a man and go by BJ and THREE boys get simple names like Gregg or Kirk??” “Well gee honey, maybe I should have stuck with flower names like Rose or Iris. At least I didn’t name you Bachelor Button!” replied her mother Pansy.
BJ attended Beaverton School Elementary and graduated from Saco High School in 1962. She grew up on a working farm just outside town here in Saco with 3 brothers who taught her many valuable life lessons which she would pass along to her children. Be respectful, gracious, kind and grateful. Remember, how fortunate you are because she had to feed the chickens, gather the eggs, get fresh water from the well to wash up in, make breakfast and wash the dishes every morning before having to walk 5 miles to school uphill both ways in a blizzard every day!
After graduating high school, she went to nursing school and earned her associates of nursing degree from Montana State College of Bozeman in 1964. The commencement exercises were held at Warm Springs State Hospital. After passing her boards, she moved to Washington DC where she worked as a registered nurse and met many new fun entertaining and interesting friends, Mary Ann Cohen and Susie Waksman. Together, the three musketeers camped, backpacked across Europe, and remain good friends.
One special and interesting friend was Theodore Raymond (Teddy Ray) Fiedler who would later become her husband. At that time, he was stationed at Fort Eustis, VA. After Ted’s release from the Army in 1970, they married and moved to Canyon City, CO where they managed a small airport and organized air shows. After Teds death in 1974, B.J. loaded up their daughter, Rachael, and began down the path to her next chapter. They moved to Denver, CO where she dusted off her nursing degree and went to work.
After working a few years in Denver, she was introduced to C.K. Allen who she married in 1976 in Maysville, MO. They bought a little farm in Kansas City, MO and added two kids, Kristin and Clint to the family. Her love of nursing and serving others continued. The family later moved to Savannah, MO where she worked at the St. Joseph Hospital, raised three children, and helped with the many nuances of the farm.
In 1984, B. J. moved back to Saco, MT and began working in Frances Mahon Deaconess Hospital in Glasgow, MT. She worked night shift there and enjoyed nighttime microwave cooking and staff antics. She attended to her patients with the utmost care and respect only the best nurses possess. Five years later, she took her skills to The Good Samaritan Retirement Home in Malta, MT where she continued her service to others. She was the director of nurses for a number of years before her retirement. The care and love she gave her residents, patients, nurses, and neighbors was full of patience and compassion and genuinely putting others first. Traits she would instill not only in her own children, but to anyone who would walk through her doors be it at home or work. If you spent time with her, you knew immediately you were in the presence of a real friend, sister, wife, aunt, cousin, confidant, teacher, protector… mother. Whenever she was around, there was a peace and a calm that would surround her and envelope you. (Her children MIGHT have tested those skills once or maybe twice, and have proven them).
BJ was a valuable asset to her community, she served on the Saco school board, ran home health care for anyone in need, and would drop everything if you came to her need. She was the first one to call in an emergency – usually before an ambulance even. Her home was a place of healing, safety, and compassion to those who needed it. And if you couldn’t go to her, she would come to you.
Throughout her entire life the only thing larger than her kindness and compassion was the always strong, never wavering love for her Savior, her Father and King, Jesus Christ. If you had a problem, she would have the right words and the right scripture! We, as her family – and her community – won’t be the same, without her physical presence. But, her spiritual presence will always be felt by those fortunate enough to have known her.
Berna Jo, this beautiful child of God, was preceded in death by her father Bernard Menge, her first husband Ted Fiedler, her mother Pansy Menge, her niece Jody Menge, and her grandson Cohen Haynes. All of whom, she is celebrating with again today and reveling in the joy of eternal life… so be joyful unto the Lord, be joyful in life and be joyful today and always!
Funeral Services will be held on Friday, May 17, 2019 at 10:00 a.m. in the Saco High School Gymnasium, with Howard Pippin officiating. There will be a reception following the service at the Saco IOOF Hall. Bell Mortuary is assisting the family with arrangements and condolences may be left at bellmortuarymontana.com.
Memorials in BJ’s honor may be sent to https://www.ethanlindberg.com/donate or https://www.gohomefoundation.org/ or a charity of your choice.
Service Schedule
Funeral Service
10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m.
Friday May 17, 2019
Saco High School
Saco, Montana 59261
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Sheri Spader says
We are so sorry to hear about the passing of BJ and send our deep sympathy and prayers to the family. Even though I haven’t been able to see her in a long time , I ve always counted her as a good friend ever since she had lived in St Joseph. She was a great person and a great. Mother!! I thought of her many times in Montana and prayed for her and the kids.
She lived her Christian walk as we should.
Now she s living it eternally.
Peace to the family.
Martina "Cookie" Tafolla says
So sorry my long time friend is gone. I’m sad that I’ll not see her again but it warms my heart to have memories of her compassionate, kind and gentle way of looking at life. She will be missed by many who were lucky enough to have their lives touched by her.
Peace and loving thoughts to family.
Carolyn Truscott says
B.J. gave such loving, compassionate care as a nurse to our mother and I’m so grateful I got to know her as a passionate Christian woman. Her joy now is unspeakable as she rests in Father’s arms. See you later, B.J.
Anne Ross (Kirk Menge's daughter) says
BJ always had a way of taking whatever people said to her and receiving it gracefully even if she didn’t agree. She could find the positive in just about anything and she would always humor the other person in a conversation because she saw the value and the heart in all people. When speaking about working with delusional or mentally declining patients she said (paraphrasing) never deny their experience because it is reality for them. Dont treat them like they are crazy, instead, join them in their reality and you will get along fine and build trust and cooperation. She was always so full of love and I think it showed in her ability to care for other people.
Anne Boothe says
Thank you to her children and family for sharing her with us. BJ held my highest respect.
Larry Putnam says
As eloquently described by others, BJ was an exceptional Director of Nursing at Good Sam/Highline Retirement Center. Her service caring for others was amazing. When I was CEO at Phillips County Hospital and rounding at High Line Retirement Center, I greeted her one day with, “How ya doing BJ Armstrong,” mixing her name up somehow with the black point guard for the Chicago Bulls. Figured she might be a bit peeved at my slip of the tongue. But she just laughed at my mistake and rushed off with a Nursing Assistant in tow to check on a sick resident who couldn’t get to the dining room for lunch. Wonderful lady and RN. Will miss her. Godspeed.
Debby Cooper says
BJ was a dear friend and an important part of our church family and community for many years. Loved by all who knew her, she will be sorely missed, but we celebrate her home-going with her family and friends. Her life embodied these verses: (Hebrews 13:14-21) 14 For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come. 15 Therefore, let us offer through Jesus a continual sacrifice of praise to God, proclaiming our allegiance to his name. 16 And don’t forget to do good and to share with those in need. These are the sacrifices that please God. 17 Obey your spiritual leaders, and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this with joy and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit. 18 Pray for us, for our conscience is clear and we want to live honorably in everything we do. 19 And especially pray that I will be able to come back to you soon. 20 Now may the God of peace— who brought up from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great Shepherd of the sheep, and ratified an eternal covenant with his blood— 21 may he equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to him. All glory to him forever and ever! Amen
Barb Peterson says
so sorry to hear about the passing of BJ and send my sympathy and prayers to the family. A wonder instructor at
Hi-Line Retirement Center to all CNA’s. Had the pleasure of traveling to Billings for a training with her. We brought the training back to do pedicures at the Senior Citizens Hall in Malta. I enjoyed all the time I had with her.
RIP my friend.
(You never met my husband, but now you can say “Hey”)
Cathy Salsbery says
I loved BJ she was so wonderful to my grandma at the Good Sam and later my “diet buddy”. She will be missed 😢😢
CathySalsbery
Diane Brosseau says
Sincere Sympathy dear Rachel, Kristin and Clint and to your families at this time, your Mother was a treasure and loved by so many…she touched lives in a gentle way with God’s grace. 💗 she will be forever remembered with love.
DIANE HARROP says
I am so sorry to hear this news–I am in shock. please know how much I loved her even tho we didn’t talk often. to the family: I am the lucky one that your mom chose to take to Alaska! god bless you all.
love, diane
Robert Goldhamer says
Shocked and saddened to learn of Berna Jo’s passing. Such a beautiful person in many ways. Our paths overlapped in Washington in 1969, and I’ve remembered her fondly ever since. I just assumed she’d live forever! But surely she’s doing just that, living in the next phase of life. She deserves that.
MARY ANN COHEN says
It was an honor to have BJ in my life. We met at our first nursing jobs in Washington and became best friends for life. She taught me to love God. I love her “it’s a God thing” saying and use it. She will be missed and she will be a blessing forever. I’m so glad I have met her parents, brothers, children and some of her grandchildren through our years of friendship.
Sallie McNamara-Gordon says
I will never forget riding horseback with Berna Jo in Beverton. She let me ride Rat and he was a wonderful mount for an inexperienced rider. I remember so well. She was a cousin by marriage but I thought of her more like a sister. We lost touch but I remember her well. she was so sweet when I went to the Saco School reunion in 1987-88.
Rest in Peace BJ